It was one of those grumpy days when you forget to be thankful for what you have but rather dwell on everything you don’t yet have, as if when you get all that, you will not have anything new to be grumpy about. You’ll be perfectly happy for the rest of your life, never a dull or bad moment. Anyway, I was in the grump walking from the parking garage to work on freshly “cleaned” streets of downtown LA. I came to 7th and Hope and waiting for the walk sign. On the other side of the street I saw an Asian lady handing out Christian Evangelical propaganda. She was standing right in the middle of the corner. The light changed and I was determined to avoid her, so I walked really fast hoping to fake her out by starting to pass her on the left then change directions and pass on the right. The sidewalk was sloped down towards me and my shoes were wet from walking on the other side of the street. I slipped with my right foot as if I was on ice and landed full force on my left knee. Asian lady was shocked and asked if I was ok. I gave her a really toothy big grin and walked away. Sort of walked. I wondered if Jesus was punishing me for not taking the literature. I hobbled off towards the building entrance which was only 25 feet away, while holding my head high trying to pretend my knee cap didn’t feel like someone just took a baseball bat to it. I was a bit in denial that I fell on the street doing nothing more than just walking, trying to avoid a religious pamphlet hander-outer.
I don’t know myself to be a klutz. This was a difficult moment. Then I suddenly got really nauseous. This happens to me when I injure myself, don’t ask why. I limped through the lobby of my office building and got on the elevator. The nausea came on really strong. The doors opened on floor 25, I wobbled and dragged my leg to the bathroom. Thank goodness the bathroom was empty. I sat down on the toilet and lifted my pant leg to see the carnage. Holy shit. A complete mess, but my pants did not get torn. I sat there and felt angry and sad about myself for about 2 minutes, let out a tear or two for good measure. I haven’t been to the Dr. for an xray, but it has been a full week now and I can pretty much walk without a limp or any pain now. I know myself to be a healer, and I don’t like Doctors. So far, so good.
I took my bruised knee to see Spamalot last night at the Ahmanson theatre with my boyfriend. I sat in the balcony, 3 rows from the very last row. I didn’t realize how nose bleed my seat was until I sat down and saw people in the section looking through binoculars. The show was very funny and well performed. I was watching it like a kid at the candy store, kept seeing myself up there. It looked like so much fun, and it has been so long since I’ve done any theater. Every time I would focus on one of the actors on stage questions would pop in my head “What did they do to get up there? What was their audition like? How long have they been doing this? Why am I not up there? Why don’t I have the career I want? Why am I still working a day job? How long is it going to take me? Why can’t I have it now?” (See first few sentences of this blog post). You catch my drift. Sometimes I was not focused on that stuff and just enjoying the show. I knew I couldn’t be up there right then and there because I was still limping and couldn’t do any of the dance routines. Ha! As if that was the only barrier holding me back. Onward! I will be grateful when my leg is 100% back and that I can’t wait to be in another theatrical production!!
